You are not going to find any formal DSM diagnosis of Covid Confinement Blues and Anxiety, at least
not yet. But the symptoms are as rampant as the virus!
I haven’t been spared from these sinking blue feelings either. Sometimes I feel like a bobbling cork adrift in unknown waters. Perhaps you too.
What we are currently living through is totally unprecedented in our lifetime. Some of you are still in a state of shock in trying to process the stark reality that this is really happening to you and your family, in your country, and in your town.
You are living in a state of continuous insecurity and the great unknown when this whole horrible viral attack will be finished. Each day you wonder how many more days can you hold out, emotionally, physically and or even financially.
The most frightening and dreaded of all is the anxiety if you will join those shocking numbers of new cases you see mounting each day.
As I write thousands of healthcare workers are risking their lives to save others. Unimaginable fear and anxiety makes up their daily bread.
Every day you wake up reading the abysmal new death counts. Impossible not to feel a sense of grief and sadness for the families and victims who didn’t make it alive out of this ravaging pandemic.
For those of you who already have a predisposition towards depressive or anxiety disorders and are not on any medication, you are more susceptible to developing symptoms.
If you are already experiencing a sinking feeling in your mood and increased anxiety, you are very normal! If your energy level is now leveling out to practically zero, you are within the norm, my friend!
You have probably noticed a decrease in your ability to concentrate and your motivation to do anything is out the window.
You might have developed increased vigilance each time you go out of your home wondering if you will this time encounter the dreaded invisible virus.
You might have noticed an increase in carbohydrate cravings, even though you are not expending any more energy than usual. That generally is to be expected with a decreased mood.
You may find yourself less tolerable and more irritable, and that too goes along with the blues.
Most of us never could have imagined this happening. We have developed a false sense of security in our world of being in control.
Now with this invisible enemy, we are just as much at the mercy of nature as the common housefly.
Some of us may have had fleeting thoughts of a worldwide pandemic happening. I know I had worries after reading a book on the Lassa fever pandemic in Africa many years ago.
Now we are living through one. It’s impossible not to feel some tettering off the rails from your usual routine and behavior.
No matter how tough you see yourself or how impermeable you think you are to stress in your life, this is making dents in your mental fortress.
Don’t let any cowboy attitude make you careless. The enemy couldn’t care less about your bravado! Your nonchalance and ironman demeanor is to the COVID virus just another easy body to set up shop.
Don’t let any news article shame you into feeling less than because you aren’t keeping busy or proactive. Confinement may be an opportunity to do whatever you have been putting off because you couldn’t afford the time, but you are under an umbrella of uncertainty and stress without being able to see the finish line.
Sure, you do indeed suddenly have all the time in the world, but there is a big difference! Your psyche couldn’t care less about all the little mundane things you have been putting off!
You are now in survival mode! Your brain is seeing things differently than your practical side right now. It is now more geared to conserving energy for flight and fight if need be.
Any extraneous drain of energy is muted or even eliminated. Your psyche will try to decrease any tendency towards multitasking right now.
Forget about pushing yourself into being productive and getting things done. Your brain is trying to thwart that from the beginning with a loss of motivation.
There is no competition with anybody else to do anything. No one is going to applause you for being a super accomplisher right now.
If anything, you might be viewed with suspect, trying to glorify yourself as being above and beyond the rest of us ordinary folks muddling through.
I know my motivation has taken a dive and any self -discipline to do my weights has flown the coop. I noticed my mood seems more hopeful in the morning but ends up waning by noon.
I start out with some voiced goals that soon sputters out on the back burner of “mañana”. I really miss the liberty to get out as before. Certainly, you do too!
Now every outing has to be under the auspices of authorization either filled out on paper or now obtained on my telephone with a QR Code.
My Saturday shopping trip was a wait and see game, not knowing if and what I could find. Long snaking lines were everywhere foods were sold.
I decided to take a somewhat back route to Rue Daguerre, the wonderful foodie street in my arrondissement, for a poissonnerie and boucherie that I like.
It was sunny and warm and I looked forward to getting in more of walk than I would in my immediate neighborhood.
Before I even got to Rue Daguerre, one of several policemen asked to see my authorization. I dutifully showed her my QR code which she checked on her machine.
Saying “you are good enough for me” I went on my way. There was a line at the butcher too and after 20 minutes, I left emptyhanded as there wasn’t any more lamb.
Another one down the street had some so I then headed towards the fish man and after another 20 minute wait left with two bright eyed Rouget Barbets.
After one more long line at the vegetable fruit market to pick up some asparagus and dill, it was time to go home before I set out again; worried that the fish needs to be in the frig.
Later, as I was walking down Avenue General Leclerc for some more berries, not far from my place, I got checked once again for authorization!
Police checks and long lines are now the new norm in Paris. My usual manner of shopping here and there, at my favourite places, always looking for the best brightest berries, fruit and vegetables now comes with a greater cost of time.
So be it. I am nevertheless grateful to get out, to find what I need and prepare my beautiful foods. The motivation to create lovely meals has not waned thank goodness. Life goes on.
Life changes and we have to adapt, not with remorse but with gratitude. Gratefulness is my greatest focus. My faith sustains me.
I am grateful for the cerulean blue sky unclouded by vapor trails, the astounding quietness that surrounds me allowing me to hear the many birds songs.
Even more so I am grateful that my grandchildren, love ones, friends, patients and my daughter including myself are all so far virus free.
I am grateful to each and every healthcare worker all over the globe, deserving our greatest applause and prayers!
Let perseverance and gratefulness fill your day. Throw your mental anchor in the future and keep your gaze towards the horizon.
You might still be at sea in rocky waves, but eventually, your ship will reach the sandy shore!
PS. I am also grateful that I finished writing this!
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Grateful for your insightful blog today. ♥️
Thank you Anne, dear friend! I am likewise grateful for your friendship, love, and support! Hugs
I’m grateful, too, for another day and for your timely blog.
My closets can wait.
Maybe I’ll just write in my journal, instead.
Or not.
No…
I’m going to make some vanilla panna cotta and top it with raspberry coulis and put it into some pretty martini glasses– that’s what I really want to do.
Thank you Maggie and welcome to my blog! I second your idea of making panna cotta with raspberry coulis! Bravo! Preparing beautiful dishes to bring you joy is more important. Enjoy!
Great insight about the uncertainty of this whole pandemic. Some in the world have thought they were in control. We now know that God is still in control as He has always been even when we don’t even remember that He exists. Keep Blogging. It is so refreshing to hear your thoughts.
God Bless,
John & Gay
Thank you John for voicing your faith-filled thoughts, that I equally share. Thank you also John for your encouraging words. Easter Blessings to both of you too! Hugs
Thank you, Cherry, for always giving us hope.
Love and Hugs, Carol
Thank you Carol for your kind comment. Hope springs eternal for us all, but we must continue to be vigilant about our safety right now! Love and Hugs to you and family
Merci Cherry pour ces paroles réconfortantes pleines d’espoir. Qu’elles volent à travers le net et donnent courage à toutes et à tous qui souffrent de maladie et/ou de dépression.
Merci a toi aussi Georges pour tes commentaires toujours aussi sympas que toi. Je suppose que tu n’a pas encore pu quitter Pontedassio. J’espère que tu garde le moral malgré ton situation énormément difficile. Hugs
As we heard on March 24th that the highway fuel stations would close, we started immediately the same day at 10 PM and went home. In Florence we were stopped for two hours by a snow storm (!!) and a truck accident. After two police checks on the highway and a little detour to the supermarket we arrived at 1 PM for staying 2 weeks in quarantine (we had to register at our doctor and our town hall)… Today we have got two FFP3 masks and will be able to do our food shopping (within a radius of 2 or 3 km.)
Fais attention à ta santé et continue à nous prodiguer tes excellents conseils!
Grosses bises
Inge & Georges
Oh Georges, what a perilous journey you had to reach home in southern Italy! Snowstorms, highway accidents, police checks, gasoline worries and the tremendous long drive in the most stressful of conditions! Bravo and Hallelujah! You made it! Hugs and blessings.
Today’s excursion. I needed to post a colissimo package. I had weight it and printed out the documents at home so it was ready to go; I just needed the deposit stamp.
On the way to the post office, I stopped at our butcher, but after no movement in the line, I continued to the post office. There, the line stretched 3/4 of a long block. By the time I got to the end of the line, the security agent put up the barrier and told me to come back in the afternoon.
I decided to go to the gas station that also serves as a post drop off site. On the way there I thought of dropping in at Picard (frozen food store) But the line was long so I continued on. At the gas station I was the only customer. Oof. Package sent. I stopped at a corner Franprix (not the one near our street) and the stock clerk was setting out the flour. 1 k. per customer. I took it. It’s T45 (pastry flour), not really what I want, but I’ll make it work.
I think I got my 12000 steps done.
Thank you Ellen for sharing your own frustrating multi stops just for essentials. You have to have a lot of patience and resolve! Lucky you found some more flour! I am not out yet, but supply is getting low. Fortunately, I have several flours of other grains and coconut flour, so I intend to make a melange to extend my wheat. Have you had the energy and motivation to knit? Hugs
Weighed, not weight
Lovely post. I’m generally OK (strange, since I typically struggle with anxiety) but find grocery shopping stressful. The lines and the masks are unnerving. And then I disinfect it all at home. And yet, I want my teens to feel as normal as possible so out I go. It feels like years since life was normal but I’m trying to embrace little pleasures: cooking, walking the dog, readying my garden. Stay safe.
Happy to hear from you again Jen and that you and family are safe! You have a difficult balancing act with your teens trying to protect them from over-stressing out yet making sure that they take precautions as well. Teens are fairly resilient yet don’t have the maturity to see the overt dangers, so don’t worry if you have to emphasize the actual extent of danger. Hugs
Cherry, thanks for the time and energy YOU always put into writing your blogs while definitely under abnormal stress or in survival mode .
I know covid is trying to putting dents in my mental fortress alone with cancer and all the treatments.
But after reading your blog I have a much better feeling. I have thrown my mental anchor in the future and my eyes and FAITH or on a much better time.
Hugs to you
🎼DON’T WORRY BE HAPPY 😷
🎶BECAUSE EVERY LITTLE THING IS GOING TO BE ALRIGHT 😃
Thank you again Isham. YOu are on two battlefronts now with cancer and Covid lurking. You have great perseverance Isham and with your faith, you will pull through! Glad to know that you have thrown your anchor into the future! Healing hugs
Thanks for this, Cherry. I live for the day we can join you in Paris for a delicious and delightful dinner. I’m trying to keep that in my mind as a real possibility.
Thank you Kay! I love your thought of a dinner chez moi! You are formally invited! Please keep on being careful, as there are protestors defying the confinement in the US. Hugs